Boulevard Of Broken Dreams
by a mountain of gideon's scones
Summary: RoxannexLeeJordan. Because when you find true love, you cling onto it, even though there's the age gap... oh, and the fear that your Dad'll kill you. for around the r i v e r b e n d! R


_Roxanne/Lee – cross gen – for around the r i v e r b e n d_

_I don't own anything_

_Thanks to Vitzy for reminding me about this fantabulous song!_

* * *

_I walk this empty street  
On the __**Boulevard of Broken Dreams**__  
Where the city sleeps  
and I'm the only one and I walk alone  
__**Boulevard of Broken Dreams, Green Day**_

~**x**~

She digs up another clump of grass and picks the blades apart one by one, venting her frustration and anger into desiccating the strands of green, the chlorophyll inside staining her fingers as she continues to do this.

It's the only way she can stop herself from crying, to prevent herself from curling up into a ball and rocking herself to get through the pain of possibly the most heart wrenching break up she's ever had.

Being a Weasley girl, beautiful and redheaded, she's had her fair share of the boys throughout the years, with ill advised flings with Slytherins all the way to boys five years her junior. But now, she's twenty three and thought for the past three months she had something called happiness… true, it was with someone a few (ok, _twenty eight_, but who cares about the difference?) years older than herself, but it should be about their _personality_, not their age.

The only issue is that the happiness was with Lee Jordan, her father's best friend.

She didn't _mean_ to fall for him, so much older than herself – since when do you _ever_ do that? She had her heart set on someone young, blonde, beautiful like her – a bit vain and airhead-y a comment, but it was what she wanted – but then Lee came along and her heart flew to him.

It all started exactly ninety six days ago, a bitter memory now since it marked the happiest moment of her life to date till merely three days ago.

~**x**~

She walks down the street – well, _walks_ is a little loose a word for stumbling when you're completely bladdered after spending five hours straight drinking shots in the pub round the corner from her house – and falls into a drain, just the regular thing to do when you're drunk and wearing ridiculously high heels. But instead of getting up, she just sits there and laughs, watching blood pour from her knees but not feeling the pain due to the excess of alcohol she has in her system.

"Roxanne!" a familiar voice calls her name from the direction she had walked, but she can't quite place who it is. He's someone she has known for a few years now – from work, perhaps? – but his name has completely fallen from her mind as he reaches her. "Oh God, are you ok?" he seems so worried for her that she ceases her laughter to look into his dark brown coloured eyes.

Somehow, she finds her arms wrapping around his neck as he tries to get her to stand up on her own, but fails miserably. Her attention is entirely on this guy with cropped black hair, one she _knows_ she knows; she just can't remember his name.

"Come on," he says, finally hoisting her to her feet and staggering with her down the street towards the shelter of a nearby house. "Let's get you sorted," he continues, but he doesn't have the right light to see in order to heal her wounds…

She wakes up the next morning on his sofa, foggy headed and unable to remember anything from the night before besides for the fact she came home with… Lee…

Her Father's best friend had to take her back to his house because she was so drunk, she couldn't even walk straight.

"So, you're awake," the guy who is actually over fifty, but looks about thirty, says to her with a smile as he stands beside her.

"Um… Lee, I'm sorry," she says, blushing as she realises he's had to look after her all night – and he barely even knows her. After her Uncle Fred she never met died, apparently Lee ran off into the wilderness, unable to comprehend life without one of his best friends – something even his twin didn't do. So the first time she actually met Lee Jordan was when she was 21, when he randomly turned up for the fiftieth birthday of her Dad, saying he's been back in the UK for three years but didn't know how to approach them until then.

"It's fine, Rox," he tells her softly, his face telling her she means it. She ought to be scared – she's somewhere she's never been before, with someone she only knows through work and her dad, sort of – but she's strangely relaxed in his presence. He seems pretty cool to her, almost from her generation. The earring in his ear _certainly_ doesn't make him seem older.

"Are you sure?" she confirms, sliding around to sit up properly. "Look, thanks… do you want to go out for dinner sometime, so I can say thanks?" she finds herself asking him out. Part of her knows – _thinks_ – it's wrong, but she doesn't care; she's attracted to him in more than just a sexual way, as it usually seems to be.

He seems taken aback but nods; evidently debating whether this is a smart decision before deciding he may as well.

"Sure, next Saturday at 9'll do just fine," he replies, causing a smile to slide onto her lips.

~**x**~

They go on the date in a little Italian she knows in northern England, somewhere she knows none of the many Weasley relatives will find her – she doesn't fancy explaining why she's out on a date with Lee Jordan. After all, the only thing they'll see is someone they _know_ is over half a century old, rather than the sweet guy he is underneath.

They spend the entire meal talking about random things: how he felt when he commentated the Quidditch matches, how many species of animals Luna has made up, whether her Grandfather will fail in making a wizarding version of the telephone to be usable at Hogwarts as well.

It doesn't feel like it, but they end up spending three hours in there, never running out of conversation topics. Only after they finish drinking their third cup of coffee (no alcohol after the other night) after the meal do they finally make their move to leave, Lee _insisting_ on paying the bill even though they went for her to say thank you for him helping her.

"I... I had a great time," she finally says as they stand outside the door in the brisk spring air, only a thin cardigan to protect her arms from the wind.

"I'd really like to do it again," he agrees before hesitating slightly. "Just, would you mind keeping this quiet from your Dad? I don't fancy telling him I'm going out with his daughter – if that is what this is, if you know what I mean?" he garbles his words, jabbering on and on until Roxanne finally just shuts him up with a soft kiss upon his lips.

He kisses her back before she Disapparates from the restaurant and returns home, leaving him standing there, wanting her.

~**x**~

As she looks back over the relationship with Lee, she realises that it was in two distinct parts. Firstly, there was the time when he was chasing _her_, when she was playing all her cards close to her chest, to keep him interested.

But then the tables turned.

Soon, she was chasing _him_, wanting to go out with him all the time, just enjoying his company. He didn't seem to mind, she thinks with a bitter edge to the thought; he _wanted_ to go out with her, it was just her recommending that they _did_…

~**x**~

By the time they reach eighty days together – not that she has been particularly counting the days, it just coincided with other dates she's been looking out for – she's daring to recommend they eat out in venues she knows her relatives eat in, on the off chance they are _in_. she _wants_ to tell the world that she's dating Lee Jordan – as, for the first time, she thinks she's falling in love.

She loves the way that he's growing his hair back to dreadlocks like he had when he was younger, simply because she likes them (they make him look younger). She loves the way that no matter _what_ she wants to talk about, he's game, happier still if it's an opinion he can dispute – oh he does _love_ to debate with her.

Then he takes her home and she admits that he's right…

Every time they eat out, however, they never bump into anyone she is related to – or even knows. Normally, when she chances eating in the restaurants (they do _delish_ food) with a date, her cousins or aunts and uncles come in – and, on very rare and horrific occasions, her brother and embarrass her, but the one time she _does_ want them here, they don't turn up.

Finally, one night as they sit in her flat (again, deliberately without Anti-Apparation charms so people could walk in), she decides to broach the subject.

"Lee," she begins slowly, holding his hand in hers. Only here, at this closeness, can she begin to see the wrinkles forming on his skin, feel the slight relaxation of his skin around his bones that signals that he _is_ getting older. You would think he _was_ only a little older than her and certainly not the age of her Dad – who actually _does_ look however old he is now.

"Yes?" he questions her stating his name, smiling slightly.

"I want to tell people about us," she says quietly, feeling him tense up beneath her touch. She understands why he is reacting like this – normally when she dates someone, she wants to keep it quiet for as long as possible, since it's normally _her_ being the heartbreaker in the situation, and to be revealing their relationship shows she's not bored of them yet.

"I thought we agreed that we weren't going to tell anyone," he says in an almost catatonic voice, staring at the floor in the corner rather than look at her.

"We haven't… I mean, we did," she responds pleadingly, looking at his face, though at a profile angle since he is staring at said floor. "But that was _months_ ago, Lee, and I really have a good feeling about us! I'm sure my parents won't be _that_ mad and…I think, I mean I _know_, I really like you, Lee. So why can't we tell anyone?"

"Something tells me that your dad will be a _bit_ more than mad," he answers her but not her question. "And… I don't know, Rox, it's probably not right anyway. I mean, I'm so much older than you…"

"Teddy is older than Victoire," Roxanne protests, deigning not to mention the age gap is merely a year and a few months. "And Dominique is _way_ older than Scorpius! I just want to _tell_ someone; I'm sick of sneaking around!"

"We haven't exactly been sneaking around, Roxanne," he lets her know that he's seen right through her plans to tell people about them by showing them. "And, to be honest, this has been fun, it really has. If you were a bit older or if I were a little younger, maybe, but I can't do this, not with the age gap being twenty eight years. I'm sorry, but I can't cope with your dad killing me."

"Are you… are you breaking up with me?" her lower lip trembles slightly as she pulls away from him, curling up on the far side of the sofa. For the first time in her life, the life of luxury, the life of being the one in control of the relationship, she just isn't.

"Yes," he says softly, the word shattering the silence painfully. It sends rivulets of pain into her heart, something squeezing it tighter and tighter until it just seems to explode – and not with love. "I'm sorry," he repeats but she waves him off, careful to not show just how much she is devastated.

"If that's how you feel… then you better go," she whispers and he nods, standing up and pressing his lips to her temple softly before Disapparating.

This kiss is what kills her.

She sobs for the entire night, unable to help herself as she realises this is the reason she has never gotten emotionally attached to any of her prior conquests. It would only have ended like this if she did… and she _really_ wishes this hadn't ended like this.

~**x**~

No matter how hard she tries, the tears spring to her eyes as she involuntarily thinks of this memory only three nights ago.

But she forces herself to look around her at the huge lawn at the back of her parents' house, to take in the idyllic picture of tranquillity, of perfection, to calm herself down. She takes deep breaths and imagines tomorrow night, the night where she is going out on the town with her girlfriends to get absolutely hammered – and, this time, nobody is going to help her if she falls.

Which is just what she wants.

She's going to get dolled up to the nines, down whiskey shots and dance with random strangers and never, _ever_ think about Lee Jordan again. It was a mistake, probably, and she'll learn to forget about it in time.

She'll never be faithful again.

So she throws herself up off the ground and begins to walk slowly back to the house, where her mum is making some sort of cake at the minute, one that Roxanne has never bothered to identify, only knows she loves.

But, as she enters the house, she hears voices. Ones that are familiar.

One in particular that sends ice back into her newly repaired heart.

"Hey, honey," her dad says, stepping back to unblock Lee from Roxanne's view. "Lee just popped by for a chat."

"Yeah, about work," Lee pops into the conversation, setting his eyes on Roxanne in a way that tells her that it's nothing to do with work at all.

"Ok then, let's go through there," she manages to keep her cool, walking with him into the living room and locking the door, setting up all the necessary charms to keep her parents from listening in. "So, what do you want, Lee? Want to hurt me anymore? Didn't you get enough the other night, so you've come back for more?"

He shakes his head and sits down, facing her the entire time. "I've been thinking; I only did what I did because I thought you would be better off with someone your own age, someone who could be your parents' second son. But I need you, Rox, more than you could possibly know."

She tries to stand strong, to make sure that she doesn't go back to him too easily, but it's hard. It's harder than normal when she's breaking up with people and they're begging her for a second chance, probably because she actually loves this one – it's love, she's sure of it.

"No," she finally responds. "I'm not going to, Lee. You broke my heart and then come running in here and try to get me back. Tough – I'm going to the wizard club tomorrow night and I'm going to have fun. Got it?" she hopes her subtle request isn't _too_ subtle, that she really _does_ want him back but wants to make him work for it.

He nods, dejected, and walks to the door. "I hope you change your mind, Rox, I really do," he says in a subdued voice, causing her to worry that he hasn't understood what she has said.

But she doesn't say another word as he walks out, out of the room and then the house…

Her face tells her parents not to ask.

~**x**~

She and her best friend Lindsay head to the wizarding club, dressed in possibly the shortest dresses in the universe, their faces slathered in makeup and their hair coiffed to perfection.

For the next three hours straight, they drink shots, they dance, they flirt, they dance with the boys they've been flirting with, until Roxanne's had enough.

She can't get him out of her head – is he going to show up?

Lindsay seems happy with some dude she vaguely recognises (a possible conquest?) but doesn't know his name, so she leaves, heading down the same road as she did three months ago, dejected beyond belief.

She really thought he was going to show.

"Looking for someone?" Lee's voice comes from the building where he carried her, causing her to shriek and almost fall back in the drain. "Careful now, we don't want you in the drain again!"

"What are you doing here?" she asks him, hand over her heart as she tries to slow it back to its regular rhythm.

"Sorry, was I reading into your telling me you planned to come here today too much?" his brow furrows as he contemplates this. "If so, then sorry. I'll go," he continues and makes to turn away.

"No!" she jumps in instantly, unable to let him walk away _again_. "I meant, why didn't you meet me inside the club, like I meant?"

"You meant that?" he stares at her dumbly. "I thought you meant meet me where we met," he continues, showing more insight into the situation than she did.

"Oh, um, yeah, that's what I meant, I was just testing you," she grins, stepping forwards. "But you know that if we're together, you'll have to tell my parents about us _someday_, right?" she takes another step towards him and waits for him to close the gap.

Which he does in a heartbeat, taking her hand as he looks right into her eyes. "I know, Rox, I know… I'm just hoping for some accident that means he can't beat me up for it," he grins a toothy grin, shaking his dreadlocks about a bit which makes her laugh.

"So we're settled then," she laughs, leaning over to kiss him softly. "Come on then, best go get prepared for the revelation to my parents," she continues, taking his hand and Disapparating back to her flat, happy.

No longer a serial seductress, she's just in a relationship with a man she loves.

Now, to tell the parents…

* * *

_Hope you liked._

_Don't fav without reviewing please… or read without reviewing either please!_

_Vicky xx_


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